Healing Forward: Choosing to Break the Cycle

There’s a profound moment in each healing journey when you realise you’re no longer living from your wounds - you’re living from your healing. And in my case, breaking the ancestral habit of causing trauma by healing it for myself and for others. As a holistic consultant, I’ve both witnessed and personally experienced these moments. For me, a turning point came during an unexpected reconnection with my godfather. His gentle words affirmed something powerful: I wasn’t perpetuating harm. I was actively healing it. I was choosing every day to break cycles and support healing.

This transformation didn’t happen in a single instant. Instead, like mindful breathwork, it unfolded one conscious breath, one set boundary, and one compassionate choice at a time.

From Being Shaped by Pain to Shaping My Path

None of us choose our earliest stories. But we do choose what we carry with us and how we integrate those stories. Growing up, my nervous system was often on alert, anticipating disruption. In those moments, I learned to adapt, to survive, to prioritize others’ comfort over my own needs.

My healing began with a pivotal question: What if the ways I learned to cope aren’t the only ways to live?

With gentle, holistic practices, my healing revealed itself through small shifts:

• Saying “no” and trusting that my needs mattered.

• Taking a mindful pause before reacting, then responding in a way that felt aligned with the person I wanted to become.

• Checking in with my body - using breathwork to settle anxiety or EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) to gently unravel stuck emotions.

• Allowing safe relationships to develop, receiving support without guilt.

• Choosing moments of Reiki or energy work to clear away stress and reconnect with myself.

Every practice-each deep breath, each tap, each energy clearing-helped to rewire my present, not erase my past.

Reconnection as a Mirror

When my godfather returned to my life, it was like seeing a reflection of my own growth back at me. We shared our hardest truths and found space for laughter in the cracks. He didn’t come to fix me - he came to witness me, reminding me of my wholeness before and beyond all I had endured.

As holistic practitioners know, we all need a witness on our journey. Sometimes, another’s loving presence lets us see our progress when we’re too close to recognize it ourselves. That external validation, like a post-session glow after Reiki, anchors our progress and commitment to healing.

Breaking Cycles Is a Practice, Not a Performance

Healing isn’t a linear trajectory or a checklist. Real transformation is spiral-shaped - each turn bringing us back to old places with new tools in our hands and hearts.

Breaking cycles in my life now looks like:

• Choosing repair instead of retaliation when hurt.

• Naming and releasing old patterns through tapping or a grounding breathwork session.

• Allowing time and space for integration, sometimes through a quiet Reiki practice, before re-engaging in hard conversations.

• Setting boundaries from a place of compassion, not guilt.

• Asking for help - recognising vulnerability as strength, not weakness.

My work as a holistic consultant reinforces that these practices aren’t about perfection but about the willingness to return, again and again, to what heals.

Resilience with Soft Edges

We often frame resilience as toughness, but in holistic healing, true resilience is supple. It’s found not only in pushing through but in the moments we rest, invite joy, or simply allow ourselves to be. It’s the willingness to sit with discomfort in meditation or allow breathwork to soften what’s tense.

Some days, resilience means rising with the sun; other days, it’s reaching out for a supportive session of EFT, breathwork, or Reiki. Each act reconnects me to myself and my purpose: to heal, to hold space for others, and to cultivate peace.

Self-Discovery: Meeting the You Beneath the Armour

Trauma may teach us to armor up, but healing is the process of gently removing that armor and meeting our true selves beneath. With the support of somatic work, meditation, and energy practices, I’ve rediscovered:

• A steady voice for my needs and boundaries.

• A body that remembers safety and can be brought back to calm using holistic tools.

• A spirit willing to play, explore, and trust once more.

• Core values rooted in kindness, authenticity, and self-respect.

Support Makes the Healing Stick

Healing flourishes in supportive community. My own growth has been nurtured by therapists, mentors, holistic practitioners, chosen family, and friends who remind me to care for myself - sometimes with a gentle nudge to schedule a session or take a restorative breath.

It’s not about assembling perfect people; it’s about gathering safe, consistent supporters and accessing modalities - like Reiki, breathwork, or tapping - that allow deeper integration with every lesson.

If You’re on This Road Too

• Begin with small, mindful steps. Let gentle breathwork or simple tapping be your foundation.

• Celebrate your wins, big and small.

• Build your healing circle. Even one supportive presence is powerful.

• Rest - make it sacred. Think of rest, meditation, or energy work as essential to your healing, not luxuries.

• Allow yourself to receive love, support, and care - even if it feels unfamiliar.

A New Legacy

The wisdom of my godfather and the integration of holistic practices have shown me that legacy isn’t just what we inherit - it’s what we actively create. We can pass on not only survival, but conscious healing: deep listening, radical compassion, and the wisdom of body and energy.

You are not defined by what hurt you, but empowered by how you choose to heal.

Today, I stand as a holistic consultant, committed to building bridges, honoring boundaries, and fostering gentleness - for myself and for those I support. I choose healing, wholeness, and the creation of new stories for future generations.

If you’re wondering whether you can break the cycle, remember: every mindful breath, every round of tapping, every compassionate choice is a stitch in the new fabric of your life. Keep going. You are already healing, and your freedom is unfolding.